What on earth am I doing here? I asked myself as I stood at the front steps of a quiet cabin in the Yukon while the sun majestically began to rise behind me, unveiling a desert made of snow.
What on earth am I doing here? I ask again, even though I know the answer.
Chasing after a phantom named Leita…
I knock on the door knowing that no one will answer.
We know many things before we know them…
I push the door and slowly walk inside.
The place is warm, gently warm.
I look around…
Simple but elegant furniture.
Kitchen cupboards stuffed with ingredients from every culture.
Cat fur everywhere.
Half melted candles.
And as I reach the end of my panoramic examination of the room, a giant portrait
on the back wall captures my attention and stills me into hypnotic surrender.
The sunlight is now flooding the cabin and the portrait’s golden frame shines and shimmers.
It is of two elderly figures standing side by side. The affection between them has a near cosmic effect that radiates outwards and gently lands on the perceiving hearts of onlookers
I felt it too now.
This was her core…
The smile behind her smile,
and the gentle but fierce kindness that knew no bounds…
Funny that I should use that word. I remember her telling me once that she wanted to experiment with mushrooms in order to learn how to set personal boundaries.
But now, as I stood mesmerized by the beauty of this portrait I realized just how impossible her task must have been. Just imagine a little girl trying to contain the rays of the sun with the palms of her hands.
I laughed to myself as I headed towards the door,
knowing now what I had always known…